As I try to type this post, I find myself deleting it and starting over again and again. I guess while I enjoy rambling on this blog, I never get overly personal. But in the interests of full disclosure and helping me to keep my eye on the prize, I want to mention something else that I hope will come as a result of weight loss - a relationship.
While there have been boys here and there, a fling, a drunken pash, a flirtation, an inappropriate text message or two... I am 27 years old and have never had a boyfriend in the true sense of the word. I've never introduced someone to my family, or my friends, never had a valentine.
I have no doubt that my weight has been a big factor for me emotionally. It's my suit of armour which stops me from getting hurt.
Now obviously I shouldn't let my weight get in the way of pursuing love. I guess until now, I have had terrible self-esteem. I have been overweight for so long now it has always been a barrier for me physically and emotionally.
I hope that by undertaking this journey I can learn to love myself enough to let someone else into my life. Just to put it out there to the universe - I'm ready.
This was a lovely post. Very honest. Its great that you dont settle and stay true to yourself. And if you are feeling ready then you know what they say.. 'maintain your garden and the birds will come'. I think you are on the right track :)
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